如何與伴侶一起愉快地在家辦公？專家給你支招 5 ways to get along with your new coworker - your spouse

疫情迫使人們在家辦公，也讓很多夫妻有機會看見對方工作的樣子。但是，一起過日子和一起工作畢竟不太一樣，要怎么做才能和這個“新同事”保持融洽又默契的關系呢？

1. Address the elephant in the room
把心照不宣的問題擺到桌面上來談

Knowing what your partner does is one thing, but seeing them in action is another.

知道你的伴侶是干什么工作的是一回事，但是看到他們真實的工作狀態又是另外一回事。

"We are forced into the intimacy, not just with spouses, but also with kids or whoever else is in the home," said Karen Bridbord, a psychologist in New York City.

紐約心理學家凱倫·布瑞德博爾德說：“我們被迫在一起密切相處，不只是和配偶，還有和家里的孩子或其他人一起。”

The first step in making this situation work is to talk about it. Talk about any insecurities you may have whether it's participating in a video meeting or being eavesdropped on and what you need in terms of a work environment. Then create a schedule and set boundaries when it comes to separating work life and personal life.

應對這種局面的第一步就是交談。談一談你在參加視頻會議或旁邊有人偷聽時會有的不安全感，以及你需要的工作環境。然后制定出日程安排，設定工作和個人生活的界限。

"Have a more general conversation about concerns: what are you worried about vis-à-vis work -- your partner seeing you work being one of those -- and why you worry about them," said Jennifer Petriglieri, author of "Couples That Work: How Dual-Career Couples Can Thrive in Love and Work".

《雙職工夫妻如何在愛情和事業上雙豐收》的作者詹妮佛·佩翠格里爾瑞說：“在平時聊天時談談你的擔憂：你對面對面工作的擔憂，包括你不喜歡伴侶看你工作，以及你擔憂的原因。”

vis-à-vis['viz?vi]: 面對面，相對著

In this way, you're more likely to evoke empathy from the partner which will help negotiate boundaries.

這樣你更容易喚起伴侶的同理心，對方也將幫助你協調界限問題。

2. Provide an inside look
讓對方了解你的工作內幕

Sometimes, our partners only hear the bad stuff about work: the micromanaging boss, that loud co-worker and the impossible deadlines.

有時候，我們的伴侶只聽到關于工作的負面信息：管頭管腳的老板、嗓門很大的同事和極不合理的工期。

But being forced to work out of the same office now can help change perceptions and even help partners and kids better understand what we do all day. And that's not a bad thing.

但是現在被迫在一處工作有助于改變伴侶對你工作的認知，甚至有助于伴侶和孩子更好地理解我們每天在忙什么。這不是一件壞事。

Make your work part of the daily conversation by talking about what you're working on and why it's important to you, suggested Petriglieri.

佩翠格里爾瑞建議，每天都聊聊你工作的內容，以及為什么它對你來說很重要。

"When everyone understands the priorities and why they are important, we're more likely to be respectful of boundaries and appreciate each other's work space."

“當每個人都理解應當優先處理的事情，以及為什么這些事情很重要，我們更可能尊重界限和對方的工作空間。”

3. Use project management tactics
運用管理項目的技巧

Tackle this situation like you would a challenge at the office: get organized, communicate and delegate.

像應對職場挑戰一樣來應對當前的局面：有條有理、溝通交流、分派任務。

That means defining everything that needs to be done, including child care, cleaning and cooking, and then delegating.

這意味著明確每件需要做的事情，包括看孩子、打掃和做飯，然后分配任務。

Having daily meetings to plan or assess the day or documenting all the responsibilities can help keep everyone on track.

每天開個會，計劃、評估當天的工作或記錄所有職責，這有助于每個人步入正軌。

4. Avoid treating each other like colleagues
不要把伴侶當同事來對待

You might be learning that your spouse is a fan of all the office clichés or holds too many meetings -- but it's best to keep that to yourself.

你可能了解到你的伴侶很愛說辦公室的陳詞濫調，或者開很多會，但你最好不要說破。

Even if you think your intentions are good, don't offer any unsolicited feedback when it comes to your partner's work style.

即使你認為自己的出發點是好的，但對于伴侶的工作方式不要主動提出意見。

And don't mistake complaining as an opportunity to critique.

另外，也不要把伴侶的抱怨當成批評的機會。

"Even if a partner is complaining about work, you shouldn't see that as an invitation or opportunity to provide critical feedback," said Anthony Chambers, chief academic officer at The Family Institute at Northwestern University. "Allow them to vent and be heard."

美國西北大學家庭研究所的首席學術官安東尼·錢伯斯說：“即使伴侶在抱怨工作，你也不應該將其視為請你提供批評性意見的機會。讓他們全都說出來，你聽著就好。”

5. Don't go tit for tat
不要斤斤計較

These working conditions aren't ideal for many people right now -- especially if you are juggling kids and other care giving responsibilities. It can feel overwhelming and exhausting, but try not to keep score of who is doing what around the house, or whose work is more pressing.

當前的工作條件對很多人來說都不理想，尤其是在你還要兼顧孩子和其他護理職責時。這會讓你感覺不堪重負、精疲力盡，但盡量不要計較對方在家付出的勞動量，或者誰的工作更緊迫。

英文來源：CNN

翻譯&編輯：丹妮